Her minivan disappeared from the driveway, and so did her sense of control.
That moment pushed Alyssa, an Indianapolis mother of three, to call “The Ramsey Show,” where hosts Dave Ramsey and Rachel Cruze weighed in.
“My husband has basically ruined us financially,” she said as she considered bankruptcy, taking over the bills herself or walking away from her marriage.
Together, she and her husband earn about $152,000 a year — about $120,000 from his job and $32,000 from hers.
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Yet she said they are carrying between $30,000 and $50,000 in debt and struggling to keep up with payments. The crisis peaked last year when her vehicle was repossessed without her knowledge, even though her paycheck was still being deposited into their joint account.
Since the minivan was in Alyssa’s name, the repossession left her with damaged credit. Afterward, her husband asked his mother to co-sign on another loan. Alyssa said her mother-in-law now contacts her if the payment is even a day late.
Although she considers herself detail-oriented, Alyssa said her husband had always handled the bills. After the repossession, she briefly wrote down their income and expenses and tried to stay involved. However, during a busy season with her children’s activities, she stepped back and assumed payments were being made.
“What I don’t understand is why you’re still sitting on the sidelines and haven’t gotten involved,” Ramsey said, urging her to sit down with her husband and review every dollar.
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Alyssa said she does not know the exact total of their debt. She estimated their mortgage at about $1,500 and their car payment at roughly $750. Ramsey told her she needs precise figures, not estimates.
“You may have to be the one that actually is paying the car payment and is paying the bills for a season,” Cruze said.
Ramsey calculated their combined income and walked through the basics: food, utilities, housing and transportation. He said those essentials should be paid first before any extras.
When Alyssa blamed her husband for the situation, Ramsey pushed back.